Thursday, October 02, 2014

Taliesin's Worst 100

I’ve had a Taliesin’s Top 100 for some time, it’s a living list that changes as new reviews reveal films that deserve to be in that upper echelon of vampire films. What I never did was compile a worst 100 – until now. Things to note:

This runs as #1 being the worst.

These really are the worst – the absolute stinkers from the reviews over the years (though the worst does not have a review – even I could not watch it) and, in many cases, there is very little to separate one from another. Yet even then there will be something in some of these that appeals to some viewers. Sharp eyed readers will notice that I actually reviewed Blade: House Of Chthon as 0 out of 10 but that was for the set and not the content and so it does not appear.

These are all judgement calls on my part. Also, if I haven’t reviewed it yet then it can’t appear on the list. For that very reason any of the various, incredibly awful, adult vampire movies out there have not appeared as the TMtV policy is not to review such films.

Honourable (or perhaps Dishonourable) Mentions do not qualify for this list. In the Top 100 I did include ‘Vamp or Not?’ entries, but have decided not to do so for this list.

TV shows/episodes do qualify for the list.

I am hoping it will be dynamic as I see/review films not on the list.

One thing is certain, you will disagree with the list, iro inclusions, omissions and order.

  1. Geek Maggot Bingo
  2. Robo Vampire
  3. Barely Legal Lesbian Vampires: the Curse of Ed Wood
  4. Gypsy Vampire: The Final Bloodlust
  5. Counter Destroyer
  6. The IronBound Vampire
  7. Dominion
  8. How to slay a Vampire
  9. Tales from the Crapper
  10. Nosferatu in Brazil
  11. Sorority House Vampires from Hell
  12. Malibu Beach Vampires
  13. Bluberella
  14. Treasure Chest of Horror
  15. The Spanish Inn
  16. Ankle Biters
  17. Vampire Dentist
  18. Witchcraft VII: Judgement Hour
  19. Red Lips
  20. Mama Dracula
  21. Immortal Kiss: Queen of the Night
  22. I, Vampiri: Trilogy of Blood
  23. Blood Slaves of the Vampire Wolf
  24. Gypsy Vampire's Revenge
  25. Gypsy Vampire 3: Freaky Friday
  26. Tender Dracula
  27. Devil's Dynamite
  28. Artifacts of Time
  29. Demon Queen
  30. Vampires and Other Stereotypes
  31. Scarlett Moon
  32. Night Hunter
  33. Skin Eating Jungle Vampires
  34. Witchcraft X: Mistress of the Craft
  35. Die Hard Dracula
  36. At Dawn They Sleep
  37. Vampire Blues
  38. Track of the Vampire
  39. Horror of the Blood monsters
  40. Saturday the 14th Strikes Back
  41. Psyched by the 4D Witch
  42. Gypsy Vampire
  43. Demons - season 1
  44. Zombies: the Beginning
  45. Red Lips 2: Bloodlust
  46. Shira: the Vampire Samurai
  47. Addicted to Murder 3: Bloodlust Vampire Killer
  48. Vampiyaz
  49. Bloodspit
  50. Vampire Cop
  51. Vampires on Bikini Beach
  52. Avia Vampire Hunter
  53. Vampire's Call
  54. Vampire's Call 2
  55. Vampire Junction
  56. Project Vampire
  57. The Dreaded
  58. Loved Ones
  59. Sexandroide
  60. Vampire Holocaust
  61. Vampire Knights
  62. Dracula (the Dirty Old Man)
  63. Vampire Honeymoon
  64. Addicted to Murder 2: Tainted Blood
  65. 1313: boy crazies
  66. The Sisterhood
  67. My Son the Vampire
  68. Shower of Blood
  69. Son of Dracula (1974)
  70. Vampire Assassin (2005)
  71. Taintlight
  72. Vampire Whores from Outer Space
  73. I Dream of Dracula
  74. Vampiro
  75. Gallery of Horrors
  76. Vampira
  77. Blood Kiss
  78. Dracula Vs Frankenstein
  79. Blood Freak
  80. Twisted Tales 2
  81. Corpse Master
  82. Fist of the Vampire
  83. The Lost World: Vampires
  84. Voodoo Nightmare
  85. An Irish Vampire in Hollywood
  86. Inner Circle
  87. Killer Barbys Vs Dracula
  88. Rockabilly Vampire
  89. Déjà Vu
  90. Morgana
  91. Potent Media's Sugar Skull Girls
  92. Nightfall
  93. Manborg
  94. Haunting Desires
  95. Nash Bridges: Superstition
  96. Erotic Vampires of Beverly Hills
  97. Saint Dracula
  98. Vampirella
  99. Tomb of the Werewolf
  100. The Brides Wore Blood


Alex said...

So many recommendations, so little time.

Taliesin_ttlg said...

Hi Alex. This list would be less recommendations and more challenges ;)