Vampire Dad – review

Director: Frankie Ingrassia

Release date: 2020

Contains spoilers


Pulling itself back in time to the sixties, something the film does admirably well, Vampire Dad is a comedy that feels more like the stretched out opening to a sit-com (or perhaps a couple of episodes mashed together) than it does a feature.

This does not mean it is bad, indeed it is great fun, but it means there is a missing something, which I will discuss of course. Don’t let that put you off, however. What is there works well but it could have been so much more.

pop art

At the very beginning we meet Victoria (Sarah Palmer), Goddess of the Underworld. It is 1962 and Halloween and Victoria has a trick to play and Dr Walinski is to be the treat – we see an attack through illustrations that that have a marvellously pop art style and then go into opening credits. When the credits end we discover that she attacked the wrong psychiatrist, attacking Dr Raymond Walker (Jackson Hurst) instead. Three weeks have passed and he is getting used to living with his new condition.

beginning to burn

His wife, Natasha (Emily O'Brien), knows about the vampirism – indeed she blocked the windows for him. Also in the loop is her brother Bob (Barak Hardley), a mortician who is bringing supplies of blood harvested from the cadavers he processes. Out of the loop, however, is daughter Susie (Grace Fulton) who is celebrating her sweet sixteenth. Unfortunately, Dad had arranged to take her to the DMV to get her licence and has to cancel, to explain this they make up a medical condition that causes him to avoid sunlight – we see he instantly sizzles in the sun.

Natasha, Bob and an angry vamp

Nosey neighbour Betty (Juli Cuccia) comes to the door. Her dog has caught a sense of something sinister in the neighbourhood and has been barking. Bob meets her on the doorstep and falls for her. At the birthday celebration Susie brings her slightly older, beat poet boyfriend Jimmy (Michael Naizu) to meet her parents and Raymond clearly has trouble accepting that any boy would be good enough for his Susie. So why was Raymond chosen (albeit accidentally) for undeath?

group therapy

As I mentioned, it was mistaken identity as Victoria wanted a psychiatrist to treat the denizens of the underworld. Raymond soon has a full roster of monster patients – including a “blind as a bat” vampire, a werewolf and a zombie. Raymond has to learn to control his urges, however; be it hungering for peeping toms, noisome dogs or boyfriends. And it is there where I identify the missing element of the film, as I run out of descriptive steam.

Bob and a bat

The film is genuinely amusing, with Barak Hardley stealing the show (for me, at least). The look is fantastic, cutting a sixties air and reminiscent in some ways of Parents (1989), despite the older film being set a decade before. If the two are compared, Parents had a dark timbre that this doesn’t deign to emulate and, the kicker, a full story. I think that is what is missing from this, a more defined, complex and thought through storyline. Rather than tell a tale it just remains within its own conceptual bubble and, as fun as that bubble is, the story we do get is simple and makes me think of the two sitcom episodes mashed together that I mentioned.

Sarah Palmer as Victoria

I also felt that we saw too little of the psychiatric sessions – given that was why he was recruited I really felt that we should have gone into those much more. They were ripe for comedic exploitation and could have distracted from the shortcomings in the story. However, it sounds like I am attacking the film – certainly not, or didn’t enjoy it – I certainly did. Over all the film deserves a credible 6 out of 10. 

The imdb page is here.

On Demand @ Amazon US

On Demand @ Amazon UK

The Outsider – season 1 – review

Director: Various

First Aired: 2020

Contains spoilers

I recently discovered that the Stephen King novel the Outsider is, at heart, a vampire novel. I then discovered that it was filmed as a 10-episode series by HBO and is available on VoD. Now, I will say that the lore on this is a tad different to normal and that there is both a flesh consumption and energy vampire aspect to the evil at the heart of the series. There are tropes played with as well (and to examine those I’m afraid there will have to be serious spoilers – I’ll mark the most egregious just ahead of them). The V word is used a couple of times only.

The pacing of the series is fairly slow – though it is explosive at the end – and this is one of them shows that you might want to catch and then read what I have to say. Timelines sometimes weave, without explicitly telling you that you have jumped, but the structure does work.

grizzly find

Terry Maitland (Jason Bateman) is a family man, with two daughters, and is a little league coach. That world comes crashing down around him when local detective Ralph Anderson (Ben Mendelsohn) arranges for two uniformed cops to pick him up, at a game and in front of the town, for the murder of Frankie Peterson (Duncan E. Clark). Frankie has been found in the woods, torn to shreds, evidence of bite marks and sexual violence. Terry is confused, he claims innocence.

Terry bloodied

For Ralph, the case is open and shoot. They have found a van with Frankie and Terry’s DNA and Terry’s fingerprints, there is DNA evidence on the body. He has witnesses who saw him pick the boy up in the van, saw him covered in blood and who spoke to him. He has video evidence of Terry going into a strip club to change in the toilets, testimony from a taxi driver and more video at the Amtrax station. Unfortunately, more evidence starts to arrive – Terry claims he was away at a conference that day and witnesses, fingerprints and TV footage put him in the other location.

Hooded figure

Meanwhile the Peterson family have grief placed upon grief. Frankie’s mom (Claire Bronson) goes mad with grief and has a fatal heart attack. His brother (Joshua Whichard) manages to get a gun and, when being taken to the courthouse, attacks Terry – shooting three cops and fatally wounding Terry before being shot dead by Ralph. Alone, Frankie’s dad (Frank Deal) hangs himself. Ralph is a realist and the contradictory evidence nags at him. On administrative leave following the shooting he ends up joining forces with an investigator (Jeremy Bobb) working for Terry’s lawyer (Bill Camp). Meanwhile we see, at the sites of the tragedies, a figure in a hoody – who seems (to the viewer) to have a distorted face.

Cynthia Erivo as Holly

So we gain the most of the supernatural knowledge through an investigator, Holly Gibney (Cynthia Erivo), who tracks down the points of intersection not only of Terry – and the van that was used – but also of two other alleged child killers, all of whom seem to be interconnected. She comes to the conclusion that a bogeyman creature – the term El Cuco is used – is killing the kids. The name seems to be a variant of Cucuy – which we met in the film Muerte: Tales of Horror and which had a vampiric look, at least. I preferred another name in the series, mentioned once, El Glotón Para Dolor – the Grief Eater. It seems that this thing, as well as eating flesh (it will eat animals, and it eats children because they are sweeter) feeds off the grief of the families, whose lives it destroys. The energy of the kin of the one whose form it has taken are the most potent, due to them being of the same blood – and it can tap into grief from the remains of past generations.

Eating Flesh

It takes a face (and the DNA, fingerprints etc) and the memories of the patsy for the crimes, through a scratch that draws blood, inflicted whilst still in the form of the previous stolen identity. It can, whilst in someone's form, see through their eyes and know what they know. After feeding it starts to transform into the next one with its blurred face being the transition between the two. There is some evidence that it can spiritually project itself to interact with people, even beat someone up like that, but that it may be physically weak. Its spiritual projection, and its physical presence, can leave a residue (that, when analysed, the labs can’t identify).

the rash

It can also get itself a Renfield – during the primary investigation this is maverick detective Jack Hoskins (Marc Menchaca). Jack is attacked and a brand (for want of a better description) is put on his neck – a rash that blisters and causes agonising pain and is therefore used to control him (with the rash easing when he obeys). The connection with El Cuco can make him see things and it is Jack we see attacked by the non-substantial projection of the creature (in the form of his mother (Denny Dillon)). We see the fate of a previous Renfield, committing suicide by cop to escape the guilt, the pain and the insanity.

So, in the next paragraph are the major spoilers.

Jack beaten for failing

I mentioned that the V word is used – but it is not an explicit descriptor. There is a joke about a Yiddish vampire (and the episode name reflects that, The One About the Yiddish Vampire) and the word is used in dialogue once when Jack asks Holly “So, what is it?... Vampire? Satan? Joker? A Guilty Conscience?” She doesn’t know. However, when it is confronted by the show's version of the crew of light it is pinned with a stalactite through the chest (but on the right) and then stabbed in the heart. This isn’t enough to kill it though, as one protagonist realises, but does tie into early tropes where stakes pin the vampire to their grave. The knife is removed and its mobile hand stabbed and pinned (to stop it scratching, one assumes) and its head caved with a rock (arguably akin to beheading) but before the rock comes down its face morphs through the last few of the faces it has stolen – which reminded me of the souls escaping Barlow at the end of Salem’s Lot (2004). There is a post credit sequence built to make one wonder at the finality of the kill – so that, although this was meant to be a one-shot series there is a pathway for it to return, like any good vampire. I’ll also mention that we see an armadillo in the cave in which El Cuco is found – now they are found in Georgia but it did bring Dracula (1931) to mind.

Ben Mendelsohn as Ralph

And there you have it. El Cuco uses many of the vampire tropes and both eats children and feasts on negative energies. I mentioned that the pace is quite slow – preferring to look at the psychological journeys of Ralph, his wife Jeannie (Mare Winningham, American Horror Story: Hotel) and the impact on Terry’s family, especially his wife Glory (Julianne Nicholson). It also takes a lot of time to follow Holly, who identifies herself as an outsider due to her gifts – she seems to be on the spectrum and also have some form of savant syndrome. Holly is a fantastic character and sympathetically portrayed by Cynthia Erivo. The pace might be off-putting to some but trust me that it does explode at times especially as it goes into the finale. There are some questions left standing around the ending, that I won’t spoil as they are not lore related (or at least add nothing further to the lore discussion). However this kept me watching and I fairly much binged the series. 7 out of 10.

The imdb page is here.

On Demand @ Amazon US

On Demand @ Amazon UK

Child of the Night (Power of the Blood World Book 1) – review

Author: Nancy Kilpatrick

First Published: 2011

Contains spoilers

The Blurb: POWER OF THE BLOOD WORLD Revised and Updated!

Child of the Night is book 1 of a 4 vampire-novel series that throbs with danger, treachery, betrayal, cruelty and dark, sultry romance. In a world where the undead are wary of and competitive and view humans as only prey, amazingly, three Blooddrinkers from different eras and cultures are able to form relationships. But change breeds more change as their individual stories unfold, blending and escalating, adding pieces until the horrifying picture becomes clear: both species are in danger of extinction!

Book 1 – CHILD OF THE NIGHT

André is a cold predator and Carol, a human woman with nothing to lose, becomes his preferred prey. In the blink of an eye, things alter for the better,—and then for the worse. Change can be deadly, especially for a mortal who now realizes she does have something to lose!

The review: I am kind of torn when it comes to this review. Yes, the author is a Facebook friend but that is not the reason why, and I endeavour to always write an honest review. Rather, well you see Nancy Kilpatrick is a strong wordsmith and this volume – first published in 2011 and revised and re-released in 2020 – is no exception to that. The writing is strong, the vampires interesting, though not nearly as much as they are in her Thrones of Blood series. Indeed, with this having a strong thread of eroticism in it I can draw a line in conceptual undercurrent between this contemporary based series opener and the later series – indeed both books have an underpinning of sexual violence that I’ll return to.

So why torn. Well it comes down to the primary characters – vampire André and human Carol and the fact that I found neither likeable. André is an abusive, egoistic narcissist, with anger management issues and Carol? She should illicit the reader’s sympathy or, perhaps, even concerns. A recent divorcee, whose ex-husband may have given her HIV, she is targeted by the vampire, manages to escape but is captured the next night and (to prevent her impending, envisioned murder) offers herself sexually to him, agreeing to be, essentially, a sex slave for a fortnight if he does not kill her (she assumes he is a part of some blood fetishing cult, rather than an actual vampire). Its just, I couldn’t summon that sympathy; the character played out as a co-dependent in an abusive relationship who could not escape (again a trope that should illicit sympathy) but, probably because the eroticism was drawn from the dominance/submission and, let’s be honest rapey, scenario, the book kind of revelled in the relationship (it is the primary story-foundation) rather than using it as a morality play.

As I say, I could see parallels with the author’s later series, and the sexual violence within that – but somehow it was less disturbing within that fantasy/sci-fi setting with vampires who really were like another species - their alien design and nature feeling more fitting within their unique scenario.

Now that’s not to say that the book isn’t worthwhile. The vampires are more on the standard lore-build – though it allows that male vampires might impregnate a mortal woman on very rare occasions (through an act of love) and that child – at around the 9 or 10 mark must chose to be mortal or vampire. There was a quote at the head of the novel by Mary Renault, "it is not the bloodletting that calls down power. It is the consenting". I thought this was a great concept – though the vampires in the story don’t seem to rely on consent for their feeding and, with hindsight, the quote seems more aimed towards the coerced consent that Carol offers sexually. However, the reason I found the vampires interesting was within their social structuring and the idea that this mismatch of alpha predators were able to draw together through the non-interference rules they developed.

So strong, confident prose, a story that is very eroticism orientated, with the warning that the abuse-based nature might be upsetting for some readers (forewarned is forearmed), and an interesting social structure for the vampires. On the other hand, I could not gel with the primary characters. 6 out of 10.

On Kindle @ Amazon US

On Kindle @ Amazon UK

What We Do in the Shadows: Season 2 – review

Directors: Various

First aired: 2020

Contains spoilers

So, in the middle of lockdown from Coronavirus along come some vampire antics to keep us entertained. In the UK we had to wait until the end of the US 10-episode run but the BBC dropped all the episodes onto iPlayer in one go.

It would be wrong to assume that everyone reading this knows the show, so as a potted history: In 2014 came the feature film What we do in the Shadows, where a camera crew followed a group of vampires sharing a house in Wellington, New Zealand, for a documentary. This was spun into a series in 2019 – with a new group of vampires who live on Staten Island. The series is in the same universe and the original vampires cameoed in a season 1 episode.

Laszlo and Nadja

So this is the second season and we are still with Nandor the Relentless (Kayvan Novak), as well as his familiar Guillermo (Harvey Guillén), Laszlo Cravensworth (Matt Berry, Snow White and the Huntsman) and his wife Nadja (Natasia Demetriou), and energy vampire Colin Robinson (Mark Proksch). As the season began, I felt that the first episode – with new familiar Topher (Haley Joel Osment), who ends up dying and being zombified – missed as much as it hit and worried that it didn’t bode well for the season.

Nandor's ghost

I shouldn’t have worried. Episode 2 not only brought in a fantastic concept but turned the comedy pow factor up a notch, which they then maintained through the rest of the season. So, what was the concept? The gang find they are being haunted by Nadja’s ill-fated lover Jeff (Jake McDorman). We met Jeff in season 1, he (normally) reincarnates, is drawn to Nadja and meets an unfortunate end… this time he has decided to haunt his vampire love. With Jeff mostly ignored, the vampires then wonder whether they have ghosts – after all they are dead – and manage to summon them. This plays with a great concept around vampires and souls – after all their ghosts would be the spiritual aspect of the vampire.

needing a helping hand

It’s a comedy and so the show doesn’t go into this in any depth but leaves the idea raw, open and begging exploration in a paper (for instance, as a contrast, the vampires in Buffy the vampires expressly lose their souls, hence being evil, and Lucy in Dracula has to be destroyed as a vampire to set her soul free). As it is, none of their souls have passed on because they all have unfinished business… Lazslo’s ghost needs to fulfil an orgasm and Nandor’s misses his horse. As for Nadja… well her soul decides to possess a doll and stay (though this was perhaps underused later).

Colin's eyes glow

We get an episode focusing on Colin and his life as an energy vampire – indeed we also, in another episode, discover that he can use internet trolling to feed. This brings us to the fact that the range of paranormal creatures in view are expanded in this season compared to season 1 – we meet the zombie and ghosts, of course, and a real internet troll but we also see witches who use semen to remain young looking (and vampire semen is particularly potent). Guillermo discovered last season that he was a Van Helsing and both falls in with some wannabe vampire slayers and secretly kills vampire assassins coming after the oblivious housemates.

Harvey Guillén as Guillermo

This shows that events from the last season were far from forgotten – the assassins are a consequence of the housemates being sentenced to death in the previous season and the judgement and ire of the Vampire Council is a thing through this season – indeed Jemaine Clement makes a reappearance as Vladislav, one of the film’s vampires and member of the Council. Equally one of the vampire hunters was a roommate of a victim who was turned in the previous season.

Mark Hamill as Jim

I reserve the best for last – however. The 6th episode, On the Run, sees Laszlo tracked down by Jim the Vampire (Mark Hamill, Scooby-Doo on Zombie Island), to whom he owes a month’s rent that he ran out on. A duel, turns into Laszlo fleeing and taking on the persona of Jackie Daytona (by wearing blue jeans and chewing on a toothpick). The episode is marvellous – not only with the brief cameo by Hammill but it lets Matt Berry fly. An absolute highlight.

witches

The season started shakily, not that episode 1 was bad but it was hit and miss, but it really got into a stride after that. All the leads bring something to the party, the vampire and wider horror nods are fabulous – such as the witch’s familiar goat Black Peter. The humour is genuine and revels in the vampire genre rather than attacks it. Bring on season 3. 7.5 out of 10.

The imdb page is here.

Honourable Mention: Neverwhere

So, back in 1996 the BBC aired Neverwhere – based on a concept by Neil Gaiman and Lenny Henry and I was really excited about it. The concept of a hidden London beneath London, an urban fantasy, was compelling and I remember being disappointed (though not so by the novel). It looked cheap – actually partly due to it being shot on video but lit for film as it was going to be treated to look like it had been shot on film, and then not being treated. I disliked the way the characters were constructed as well and I fairly have forgotten it over the years.

Paterson Joseph as Marquis de Carabas

However, I re-discovered it had a vampire aspect (indeed there is a vampire character) and so I re-watched it. Time has been kind, it held together better than I remember and some of the performances, especially Paterson Joseph as Marquis de Carabas, were wonderful (others perhaps were a tad BBC). The show still needed a lot more fleshing out, both of characters, setting and plot, but it was better than I remember.

Door and Richard

So city worker Richard Mayhew (Gary Bakewell) stops to help a destitute looking girl, Door (Laura Fraser), and loses his controlling fiancée Jessica (Elizabeth Marmur, Forever Knight & Blood) in the process. It seems Door is being hunted and he finds the mysterious Marquis de Carabas for her, who agrees to help for the price of a significant favour. However, when she has left with the marquis, Richard discovers that people can no longer see him and he had lost both job and flat. He has become a denizen of London below against his will.

Tamsin Greig as Lamia

He, of course, ends up both accompanying her as she tries to discover who killed her parents and, of course, becomes the hero of the piece (this is essentially a retelling of the hero quest at heart). Anyway, later into the series he is passed by a member of the Velvet, gothic looking ladies, and catches her eye. She approaches him in the Floating Market , introduces herself as Lamia (Tamsin Greig, Going Postal) and seems to mesmerise him into hiring her as a guide.

stealing his 'warmth'

Lamia and Richard fall back from their companions and she turns her charms on him, saying that she is cold and he is warm and asking him to give her some of his warmth as payment for being their guide. He agrees and she sucks his warmth out – later literally described as life – and leaves him literally starting to freeze. She is going back for more when he is rescued by de Carabas, who makes her return his life and tells Richard that she was going to make him a cold thing like her. Though the V word is not used, she is clearly an energy vampire. Whilst we see her pass by in a couple of episodes, she is only in one in any level of substance and then only fleetingly.

The imdb page is here.

On DVD @ Amazon US

On DVD @ Amazon UK

The Vampires of Zanzibar – review

Director: John Birmingham

Release Date: 2010

Contains spoilers

This was floating around as a free watch for a while and, as such, might have simply received an Honourable mention. However, the film has been put out to buy and rent in various formats and therefore it’ll receive a review.

Apparently, it features a couple of guys from Jackass – who knew – however what we get is a vampire comedy that throws in absurdism and a dose of sexually based humour (mostly around homosexuality) that tries to be edgy but actually just comes across as juvenile. However, there is also a sense that those involved were giving it their whole.

in the castle

It starts within a castle (post establishing illustrated shot with animated bats) and we meet vampire Lord Weasel Titties (Brandon DiCamillo) – yes this is the level of the ‘edgy’ humour – who is devouring some meat brought by bikini clad women. They are ordered out by vampires of the court, who inform WT that the peasants are revolting, having discovered that he is a vampire, and he will need to wear a disguise for 1000 years until a vampire prophecy predicts the rise of a vampire leader who will lead them to world domination.

1000 years in a chicken suit

WT’s response is negative as the suit is a chicken suit (and here we get the absurdist side to the humour) but an incursion by a vampire hunter – who is dispatched by ripping his guts and brain through his rear end – changes his mind. The film then moves forward 1000 years and a graffiti painted over the 'Zanzibar, Virginia' town sign changing it to say it is the 'gayest town'. We see a mini-van arrive at a restaurant, the passengers recognised by the waitresses as the band Ripping Pantyhose, who are with WT still in his chicken suit. They sing a song, whilst in the restaurant, about the Devil taking their gay away, run off with a few girls and eat them in the van.

at the skate park

Paul (Doug Dressler) is looking at the internet, specifically at the story of his missing brother Josh (John Birmingham). His dad (Robin L. Watkins, Pretty Dead Things) comes in and Paul switches the windows down quickly – leading his father to think that he was involved in onanistic activities. It is five in the morning and Paul has a speech to make at school the next day. His father reminds him to take his pills – but he throws them away on the way to school. At a skate park he meets some rocker looking guys and mistakes one, Mabus, for Josh (of course he is Josh). They persuade Paul to try a skateboard move again which he nails (Josh was a champion skater) and tell him they’re in town for a few days.

Paul and Laney

At school (and without churning out the various characters we meet) a couple of rap loving guys dose Paul with LSD in revenge for something – and accidentally dose teacher Miss Leroy (Evyh Cerhus). He falls into a trip, eventually passing out, and when Miss Leroy wakes him, and mocks him, at his desk, he produces fangs and bites her – before being driven home by a classmate, Laney (Lauren Susan). On the drive his arm blisters when in the sun. So LSD makes him a vampire?

Paul's fangs

Not quite. He (and his brother) have always been vampires as their father is one. The father experimented on a vampire to try and make an antidote to vampirism – almost succeeded but got bitten and then perfected a pill that regresses vampiric tendencies. For Paul, as well as it coming to the time prophesised, the LSD has interfered with the pill’s effects (not explicitly stated in his case, but implied as weed did the same to Josh previously) and, of course, he’s missed a dose of the anti-vampire medication.

Evyh Cerhus as Miss Leroy

Anyway, the basic plan is that Paul needs to bite a virgin to become the vampire he might be (Laney is chosen). Meanwhile Miss Leroy is spreading Paul’s blood – looking to turn as many as possible into vampires. Paul will then lead a vampire army that will take over the world. This gets Paul, his dad and Laney hunting vampires – Miss Leroy and a couple of vampires essentially turn a high school party, which the heroes then stake, and then the film follows a repeating pattern of Leroy getting away and going to the next venue (a bar and then a gay club) and the hunters following. Paul has to avoid the temptation of biting Laney.

staked by cross

The interesting piece of lore that they threw into the mix is that a vampire can absorb skills from those close (no tasting of blood necessary) and then retain the skills. Other than this the film doesn’t do much. Crosses don’t work unless used as a stake. Talking of which, some of the staking effects work, others not so much. There is some green screen flying that worked fine for the budget of the film. However, the humour didn’t work for me, I’m afraid, and just came across as juvenile though I’m sure they thought they were being edgy at times. I mentioned at the head, however, that the cast seemed earnest (if amateur) and that counted for much.

This is not a great film. However, it managed to be less annoying than it should have been and therefore I’ll give it 3 out of 10.

The imdb page is here.

On Demand @ Amazon UK

Honourable mention: Pig Blood Vampire

I have sat and wondered how to write up this 2020 film, directed by Nick Josephs, and probably the first thing to say is that it isn’t a vampire film (despite the title) but it does have a moment within it that would allow for an Honourable mention.

Indeed, I can’t really say that I overly know what the film was; surreally absurdist and strange, it bills as a satire but I couldn’t say I understood what it was satirising so much (that isn’t to say that it wasn’t, just that I didn’t ken the frame of reference.) That said it was engaging, in its own, weird way.

not blood

It follows a man, credited as Pig Blood Vampire (Nick Josephs), who is tall, wears slightly gothic formal clothing and is an actor. He also suffers from face blindness, or prosopagnosia, a brain disorder that prevents the sufferer from being able to recognise faces (and facial expressions), often from brain injury or stroke (though it can be congenital), and is not treatable in and of itself and treatments are actually the development of coping strategies. I don’t think the film overtly poked fun at the condition in any nasty way, but neither did it explore the trauma of suffering from it in a meaningful way.

on the floor

As the film starts, he is led on the floor of the kitchen as (vegetarian, by the unappetising, processed look of it) bacon sizzles in the pan. He says that he has killed a pig. A woman, credited as French girlfriend (Marie Grujicic-Delage), enters and suggests she is leaving (him it sounds like, but she is smiling all the way through and he seems simply nonplussed). He then has a run-in with Roscoe (S. Scott McCracken) and his good old boys. Roscoe is running for congress, but even so he decides to spend the film harassing the man – this takes the form of dressing as police (knowing he won’t recognise them) and, at other times, wearing pig masks whilst hanging round his property.

the "vampires"

So, the moment in the film that gets it an honourable mention. The PBV drives to a vampire convention. On his way in he meets Violet (Sara Young Chandler), who has been ejected for spilling a little blood. They walk towards the place, he is expected as an actor, and three ‘vampires’ (Paul Krantz (Kiss my Ashes), Andrew Colarusso and Shudan Wang) offer a quick set of pretentious lines and Violet drags PBV away from the convention to give her a ride. And that’s it, we don’t see in the convention but we do get a fleeting visitation of three people acting like vampires. The red liquid PBV drinks at home, which fits into the vampire mystique, is cherry juice and he is a vegetarian (hence, I guess, the insipid looking bacon).

The imdb page is here.

On Demand @ Amazon US

On Demand @ Amazon UK

Vampires – season 1 – review

Directors: Vladimir de Fontenay & Marie Monge

Release date: 2020

Contains spoilers

This is a French series, 6 episodes long, which dropped onto Netflix. We are in the realm of a teen vampire (ish, I’ll explain) and there is a high school element. However this distinguishes itself from that general scope by firstly being quite dark, bloody and gritty and secondly by introducing quickly a society hidden in the shadows.

The fact that I have seen (negative) commentary that fixates on the high school aspect without realising that this is just a small slice of the show (although in focus, yes, as the primary character is seventeen years old Doina (Oulaya Amamra)) and there is so much else going on. I have also been informed by Adrien from Vampirisme that this was based on an unfinished (but published) novel and bears scant resemblance – though I went in without that knowledge or knowledge of the book, indeed.

holding her in the sun

Some years before the contemporary show, heavily wrapped vampire Martha Radescu (Suzanne Clément) breaks into the house of her friend/nemesis Csilla Nemeth (Kate Moran). She is trying to discover what has happened to her partner. She has her young son, Andrea, with her. She and Csilla fight and Martha pulls a drape and holds Csilla’s head in the sunlight, causing her to start to burn. Eventually Martha runs from the scene, no wiser and carrying Andrea with her.

Suzanne Clément as Martha

Cut forward and Andrea (Mounir Amamra) is a young man and the Radescu are pariahs, no longer part of the Community (the vampire society). We discover that she has four children. The first two, Rad (Pierre Lottin) and Irina (Juliette Cardinski) were conceived with a fellow vampire and are vampires themselves. Andrea and Doina were conceived with her missing assumed deceased partner, a human, and do not have vampire traits, though Martha makes them take a mysterious pill daily, which causes Doina to have a very itchy rash.

blood drinking

So some background on the vampirism in this. There was, centuries before, a plague which was both virulent and deadly, wiping out most in the area it hit. Some survived but this was through mutation (one suspects it was the virus that expressly caused the mutation). The mutation made them extremely sensitive to sunlight (they do literally burn and quickly go up in flames), extremely strong and dependent on blood. They do not have fangs and age very slowly – Martha is centuries old. The family is back on the Community's radar as Irina has gone to Csilla to help get her ID as hers is out of date.

Oulaya Amamra as Doina

Andrea and Doina’s human father was a geneticist and it was he who designed the pills the kid’s take that are meant to prevent mutation. Doina, at Andrea’s suggestion, stops taking the pills her mother gives her, just as he has. However, whilst Andrea remained very much human she very quickly mutates, developing a need for blood – though she is a hybrid and can still go into the sunlight. There is a ranking to blood, we discover, the vampires can drink animal blood (and mostly do), human blood is even better and somewhat narcotic, vampire blood ranks above this and has healing properties and, during the season, it is discovered that hybrid blood is superior to all with impressive healing properties. Doina, once she mutates, develops the musty odour that vampires exude and dogs react to.

Aliocha Schneider as Ladislas

Now despite what I said at the head, there is of course some high school shenanigans – as Doina has a crush on a popular boy, Nacer (Dylan Robert), who becomes more interested as she stops taking the pills (her rash quickly vanishes and her confidence grows) and this is despite her conflation of teen lust and feeding. She also finds herself attracted to Ladislas (Aliocha Schneider), Csilla’s doted on son who is also known in the Community to be a blood junky. However, this side of the show isn’t so thickly spread that the series is overwhelmed. The true strength of the show is found in the secrets upon secrets where truth cannot be taken at face value.

the vampire elder

I enjoyed this, there was an unusual take on vampirism and the atmosphere was nicely drawn, offering an urban grit and darkness. There was a decadence to the Community (when we fully face it in a party/gathering scene), which worked whilst playing with the vampire bourgeoisie trope, though the society itself appears to be exclusively matriarchal, unusually. Suzanne Clément was superb as Martha though I would have liked to see more expansion of the Rad and Irina characters – Pierre Lottin in particular drawing an interesting thug-like character that needed room to be explored. 6.5 out of 10.

The imdb page is here.

Monsterland 2 – review

Directors: Jonathan Holbrook & Elena Stecca (segment)

Release date: 2019

Contains spoilers

I have previously looked at portmanteau film Monsterland, which was full of vampiric goodness, this second outing eschews the wraparound to become a basic anthology and there is only one vampiric element in first short film Brace Face.

Before I look at it, note that it is the attack committed and the maw of sharp pointed teeth that leads me to consider this a vampire flick (or vampiric at least), plus there is an allusion to feeding on blood – however there is no name given for the monster type and there is a satanic element as I’ll mention.

Keegan Healy as the bully

It starts with a girl (Adaryn Healy) stood in her yard when a clod of earth thrown by a bully (Keegan Healy) hits her. He taunts her about the brace, which seals her mouth, before riding off on his bike, but all this has been watched by her father (Dave Shecter). As we see her listlessly brush the earth from her shoulder, we also see him informing her mother (Michelle Stahl) about the taunting of their daughter. Looking at the daughter it has to be say that she seems pale with dark rings round her eyes.

breakfast

That night the mother awakens and realises that father is not in bed. She goes to the daughter’s room and sees him leaned over her, tools in his hand, as he loosens the brace. We also note that the daughter is bound to the bed by a restraint. In the morning father and daughter are at a table and she is hooked to two IV bags – one that appears to be saline and the other blood – he describes them as her breakfast and that is the allusion to her feeding on blood (though she is being transfused). He gives her a note with things to pick up from the store.

maw of sharp teeth

On her way back she is confronted by the bully and his sister (Chloe Holbrook) but the brace is lose and she has a maw of sharp pointed teeth beneath… I mentioned satanism and we do see mother happy that father cares so much for the daughter and, before physically showing her appreciation, she inverts a cross. Crosses through the house are a theme and this inversion suggests satanism (or more properly Catholicism, as the inverted cross is actually symbolic of the Papal seat, being the cross of Saint Peter… of course pop culture has obfuscated that meaning and replaced it with a thought that it is associated with Satanism).

the parents

This was ok but it was throwaway and had a slight speedup moment that seemed out of place. The acting of the kids was amateurish, but not offensively so, however mother and father were superbly played with a dash of 50s-suburbanism and enough uncanny to keep the viewer interested and the film nicely off kilter. Other than that, it was simple and served its role as film opener but there were much better segments later (especially the final segment, Justice Served). For the vampire segment 4 out of 10.

The imdb page is here.

On DVD @ Amazon US

On DVD @ Amazon UK