Thursday, October 02, 2014

Taliesin's Worst 100

I’ve had a Taliesin’s Top 100 for some time, it’s a living list that changes as new reviews reveal films that deserve to be in that upper echelon of vampire films. What I never did was compile a worst 100 – until now. Things to note:

This runs as #1 being the worst.

These really are the worst – the absolute stinkers from the reviews over the years (though the worst does not have a review – even I could not watch it) and, in many cases, there is very little to separate one from another. Yet even then there will be something in some of these that appeals to some viewers. Sharp eyed readers will notice that I actually reviewed Blade: House Of Chthon as 0 out of 10 but that was for the set and not the content and so it does not appear.

These are all judgement calls on my part. Also, if I haven’t reviewed it yet then it can’t appear on the list. For that very reason any of the various, incredibly awful, adult vampire movies out there have not appeared as the TMtV policy is not to review such films.

Honourable (or perhaps Dishonourable) Mentions do not qualify for this list. In the Top 100 I did include ‘Vamp or Not?’ entries, but have decided not to do so for this list.

TV shows/episodes do qualify for the list.

I am hoping it will be dynamic as I see/review films not on the list.

One thing is certain, you will disagree with the list, iro inclusions, omissions and order.

  1. Geek Maggot Bingo
  2. Acid Head: The Buzzard Nuts County Slaughter
  3. Robo Vampire
  4. Barely Legal Lesbian Vampires: the Curse of Ed Wood
  5. Gypsy Vampire: The Final Bloodlust
  6. Counter Destroyer
  7. The IronBound Vampire
  8. Dominion
  9. How to slay a Vampire
  10. Tales from the Crapper
  11. Nosferatu in Brazil
  12. Sorority House Vampires from Hell
  13. Malibu Beach Vampires
  14. Bluberella
  15. Treasure Chest of Horror
  16. The Spanish Inn
  17. Ankle Biters
  18. Vampire Dentist
  19. Witchcraft VII: Judgement Hour
  20. Red Lips
  21. Mama Dracula
  22. Immortal Kiss: Queen of the Night
  23. I, Vampiri: Trilogy of Blood
  24. Blood Slaves of the Vampire Wolf
  25. Gypsy Vampire's Revenge
  26. Gypsy Vampire 3: Freaky Friday
  27. Tender Dracula
  28. Devil's Dynamite
  29. Artifacts of Time
  30. Demon Queen
  31. Vampires and Other Stereotypes
  32. Scarlett Moon
  33. Night Hunter
  34. Skin Eating Jungle Vampires
  35. Witchcraft X: Mistress of the Craft
  36. Die Hard Dracula
  37. At Dawn They Sleep
  38. Vampire Blues
  39. Track of the Vampire
  40. Horror of the Blood monsters
  41. Saturday the 14th Strikes Back
  42. Psyched by the 4D Witch
  43. Gypsy Vampire
  44. Demons - season 1
  45. Zombies: the Beginning
  46. Red Lips 2: Bloodlust
  47. Shira: the Vampire Samurai
  48. Addicted to Murder 3: Bloodlust Vampire Killer
  49. Vampiyaz
  50. Bloodspit
  51. Vampire Cop
  52. Vampires on Bikini Beach
  53. Avia Vampire Hunter
  54. Vampire's Call
  55. Vampire's Call 2
  56. Vampire Junction
  57. Project Vampire
  58. The Dreaded
  59. Loved Ones
  60. Sexandroide
  61. Vampire Holocaust
  62. Vampire Knights
  63. Dracula (the Dirty Old Man)
  64. Vampire Honeymoon
  65. Addicted to Murder 2: Tainted Blood
  66. 1313: boy crazies
  67. The Sisterhood
  68. My Son the Vampire
  69. Shower of Blood
  70. Son of Dracula (1974)
  71. Vampire Assassin (2005)
  72. Taintlight
  73. Vampire Whores from Outer Space
  74. I Dream of Dracula
  75. Vampiro
  76. Gallery of Horrors
  77. Vampira
  78. Blood Kiss
  79. Dracula Vs Frankenstein
  80. Blood Freak
  81. Twisted Tales 2
  82. Corpse Master
  83. Fist of the Vampire
  84. The Lost World: Vampires
  85. The Night Seekers
  86. Voodoo Nightmare
  87. An Irish Vampire in Hollywood
  88. Inner Circle
  89. Killer Barbys Vs Dracula
  90. Rockabilly Vampire
  91. Déjà Vu
  92. Morgana
  93. Potent Media's Sugar Skull Girls
  94. Nightfall
  95. Manborg
  96. Haunting Desires
  97. Nash Bridges: Superstition
  98. Erotic Vampires of Beverly Hills
  99. Saint Dracula
  100. Vampirella


Alex said...

So many recommendations, so little time.

Taliesin_ttlg said...

Hi Alex. This list would be less recommendations and more challenges ;)