Draculaw – review

Director: Scott Deschaine

Release date: 2023

Contains spoilers

A horror comedy (mostly a comedy, to be fair) this not only tickled me but also used a rather unusual trope for the vampire. Of course the title brings Dracula to mind but there is no indication that the vampire at the centre of the film is Dracula, Referred to throughout as The Counselor (James Donahue) he is a lawyer (whereas Dracula hired lawyers) and it is with this vampire plying that trade that we start.

a vampire's contract

Though we only see hands, we hear the conversation between the Counselor and his client Frederick Rockman (Tom McFarland). Rockman wants to start a lawsuit against a rival and, whilst it sounds as though the vampire is trying to caution him, in fact it is clear he tempts him and has him sign a contract. The lawsuit fails and a series of counter claims are lodged against Rockman, eventually settled, though almost ruining him, there then comes the matter of the vampire’s invoice…

Sarah Dewey as Mary

We meet Mary Rockman (Sarah Dewey) as she takes her father into the nursing home. As she goes in she meets a youngish man, mistaking his room for a media room. He is Arc Gabriel (Joshua Greene) – the owner of the nursing home. Once a crack young lawyer, five years earlier something happened that smashed his confidence and he gave up law and moved into the nursing home. Mary tries to solicit his help, at first to no avail. However, after her father passes, his lost briefcase is discovered and they realise they share the same nemesis, at which point he relents – this renewed confidence shows in the filmmakers removing the makeup that made him look haggard.

James Donahue as the Counselor

Arc lost his briefcase when, celebrating a win with his engineer girlfriend Penny (Bessie Amato), the bridge they were on collapsed (invariably due to the Counselor). Her head was never recovered… Meanwhile the vampire is not only a lawyer but he has a pet politician (Dennis Mowery) and makes him get safety laws passed that are annoying and bog people down (there are a range shown through the film and they all take the concept of health and safety to ridiculous levels). This is done for a reason, it causes people to loose time and the vampire feeds on the lost time. He also cannot break a law (or at least cannot break a law and get caught), which is the apotropaic of the film. We, at the end, see him in a nebulous, smoke form where Arc combats him with the law (in the form of a book).

a vampire in the old country

There are various monsters (many seen in the coda) and Arc gets some lore help from home resident Sasha (Adela-Adriana Moscu, One for the Road) who tells him about vampires in the old country – and we get a flashback of a vampire, who is described as ghastly and far from the movie image of a vampire – and also points out that fellow home resident Mrs Hoover (Gerri Weagraff) is an energy vampire. But it is our lawyer vampire that is most fascinating in this with his diet of time. Of course the conflation of lawyer and vampire is telling in and of itself and the film plays with a satirical look at “health and safety gone mad”.

skull-headed bridal revenant

The film isn’t perfect… the haggard makeup for Arc is, quite frankly, rather stage-like, some of the green screen work is very obviously green screen and it isn’t evenly paced. That said some of the effects are brilliant. A skull-headed bridal revenant (Heather Cole) is brilliantly realised, for instance. There isn’t much horror to this; though the vampire's lower face is always covered (due to a horrendous accident, is the cover story, though likely due to a monstrous visage), he is actually more designed to be annoying. The main thrust is comedy, and I was amused, and enjoyed the unusual lore. 6 out of 10.

The imdb page is here.

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On Demand @ Amazon UK